Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne JonesMy rating: 5 of 5 stars
Rated PG for maybe one scene involving (possible) nudity and a teensy bit of romantic humor that is appropriate for most ages.
[The following review is really a conversation with myself. You have been warned.]
1] Aarrgh. I love this book far too much for a novel without a plot.
2] Wait--what?
1] Did I type that out loud? Oh, yeah. I guess that I did type it out...and then save it. Yes, you read right. This book does not have a totally coherent plot. In that respect, the movie is better than the book.
2] *GASP* DID YOU REALLY SAY THAT?
1] Yes. I did.
2] BUT THAT IS AGAINST ALL THE RULES OF BOOK NERDDOM.
1] (defensively) So?
2] BUT THAT IS AGAINST ALL--
1] I know! But it's true! What else am I supposed to think about a plot in which the characters are awesome but the plot is totally confusing? It's based off of a nonsense song. Actually, it's based off of two nonsense songs! Not one but TWO! They are totally central to the plot and practically describe it! In detail! I could probably totally write a 10-page research paper describing the similarities between the plot of Howl's Moving Castle and those two loony tunes!
2] Okay. Spill. What are they?
1] John Donne's poem "Song"--
2] Which begins "Go and catch a falling star"? That one?
1] Yeah--and plus a Welsh nonsense song called Sosban Fach.
2] The one you have been singing for days before writing this review?
1] . . . y e s . . .
2] Is that why you decided to learn how to pronounce certain Welsh words? And is that also why you bought not one but two separate recordings of the same song?
1] . . .
2] Okay. Moving on. So this book has plot issues. How?
1] Well, the hero is a selfish, whiney, vain almost-villainous hero; the heroine is a young-introverted-girl turned pushy-old-cleaning lady with a mild case of OCD combined with control freak, the villain is someone who attacks the heroine for no reason whatsoever and is strangely amorphous in appearance and behavior, and the sidekicks are a talking hearth fire and a wizard's apprentice with a crush one of the heroine's sisters, who has also taken the name of the heroine's other sister. Oh, and there is a dog that changes shape and as well as a weird old scarecrow in there somewhere.
2] Uhhh....
1] Yes. It's complicated, to say the least.
2] So if there are so many problems with the basic premise of the story, WHY DID YOU RATE IT FIVE STARS ?!
1] Because the characters win at life! They are awesome in every way ever! Especially Howl and Sophie. They have made my life.
2] (resignedly) But why? YOU SAID that Howl (I'm assuming he is the main "hero") is "a selfish, whiney, vain almost-villainous hero" and Sophie "is a young-introverted-girl turned pushy-old-cleaning lady with a mild case of OCD combined with control freak." What's so awesome about that?
1] Think about it for a second.
2] ...Oh. It's because they are totally unique, aren't they?
1] Yes. Howl is the very best kind of antihero because you're rooting for him at the same time you want to slap him in the face, and Sophie is the best kind of heroine because you want to kind of slap her as much as you want her to get turned into a young girl again.
2] I don't actually get why wanting to slap the hero and heroine makes a book worth five stars.
1] Because I still like them, that's why! Even when I want to slap them, I want them to have a happy ending! That never happened when I read Great Expectations. I wanted Pip to get slapped by every single character in the book, I wanted to smack his face, and I wanted him to get the comeuppance he deserved at the very end.
2] You do realize that you are saying that a modern nonsense book with a plot that is obviously lacking in plot is in some ways better than an acknowledged classic of English literature, right?
1] Hmph. I didn't like Great Expectations.
2] I see. Okay. Leaving Great Expectations aside, you basically just like the book for the characters?
1] And the world! The world is awesome! Who doesn't like a world in which seven-league boots may end up dumping you very realistically and unromantically in a cow pat?
2] That's funny to you?
1] It's funny because it's nothing that would ever happen in a fairy tale!
2] I KNEW that fairy tales had to be part of this if you liked it.
1] YES! Howl's Moving Castle is a glorious parody of all fairy tales! Who ever heard of a 90-year-old heroine who is (a) a hatter and (b) a cleaning lady? And who has ever seen a vain, whiny, selfish young wizard in a fairy tale? Name one!
2] Well, I can't think of anything off the top of my head except maybe...Petronella! Ha!
1] That's a modern fairy tale that is also a parody of fairy tales. Ha! I win!
2] Oops. Forgot. You're right, that is pretty cool. But you said it was the whole world, right?
1] Yes. Most of it is really that Howl is awesome and transcends two universes.
2] Okay. I give up. You win. You make no sense and this book obviously makes no sense. There is no logic. There is no Hero's Journey. There is no logic or reason.
1] Well, that kind of book has to exist, right?
2] If you say so. Although you are right that it does sound kind of funny and ironic, even if it doesn't have a plot.
1] I did start this review/conversation by saying that I love this book far too much for a novel without a plot.
2] That you did. And I still think that you may be certifiably insane. But, then again, a lot of other people love this book, too. Plus, Hayao Miazaki made an entire movie based on it. So maybe I'll try it after all.
1] (smug silence)
View all my reviews
No comments:
Post a Comment